The Love of the Heart of Jesus

Today the Church begins her celebration of the Triduum, and tonight all across the world Catholics will gather to celebrate “The Mass of the Lord’s Supper,” commemorating the institution of the ministerial priesthood, and the Eucharist. It would be impossible for us to commemorate one without the other, because they are intrinsically bound together!

I can’t remember the moment when I first thought to myself, “I want to be a priest when I grow up,” it was something that was always just there. I remember “playing Mass” as a very little kid…and if I do say so myself, I had a pretty good grasp of the rubrics for a 7 year old! I remember being captivated by the Mass, and seeing what the Priest did. There was just something about it that I feel in love with almost immediately. It wasn’t really the inspirational nature of the priest himself – in fact, I remember very little about the first priests that I knew as a kid. I just remember falling in love with what he did…as if it had a life of its own. I couldn’t tell you what the priesthood was, but I could tell you I loved it.

In my High School years I met Father Bert Richman, who I have written about a number of times in the pages of this blog, and elsewhere. In getting to know him, I got to know the priesthood, and I fell all the more deeply in love with it. He was the one who demonstrated for me that the priesthood is in fact a living thing, and it made all the sense in the world to fall in love with it. Then in my Seminary years, everything came together when I heard the quote taken from Saint John Vianney that articulated this whole concept so perfectly: “the priesthood is the love of the heart of Jesus.” It made all the sense in the world to me.

It’s safe to say that since I was a little kid I have had a relationship with the priesthood, and ever since it has been a relationship of ups and downs, times of joy and times of sorrow. There have been times of confusion and times of anger…times of clarity, times of celebration, and times of apology. However, through every single moment, I have completely and totally been in love with the priesthood. The most beautiful truth of all is that it has loved me back: because it is the love of the heart of Jesus.

You see, we all have a relationship with the priesthood…every single one of us. We all have a relationship with the priesthood because we all have a relationship with the Eucharist. The Eucharist is the heart of Jesus. It beats at the core of the Church, and will beat unceasingly until the day of his return. The Eucharist is the heart of Jesus, and the priesthood is its love…because the two are inseparable.

So what do we know of the love of the heart of Jesus? We know that first and foremost it is merciful, forgiving, and perfect. It “reconciles the world to himself” through the events we enter into this week, and it poured itself out completely and totally in the paschal mystery. We know that the love of the heart of Jesus is tireless, tenacious, and passionate. We know that it is spousal: driving him to unite himself to us in our humanity, in our death, and in our pain.

The priesthood too is all these things.

On the day of a man’s ordination to the priesthood he lies prostrate on the floor while the Litany of Saint is sung, asking for the intercession of the entire heavenly court for this, our brother, who takes on this new form of life: this man who, from this day on, is forever changed in the very core of his being. In his book, Gift and Mystery, Pope Saint John Paul II reflects on that moment, and on his entire 50 years of priestly ministry. In this beautiful work, he recounts sitting in Saint Peter’s Basilica at the start of the Second Vatican Council. He looked at the floor of the magnificent Church, and thought about the many men who had laid prostrate on it, and the great Saint Peter whose remains rest beneath it. In this moment his heart was moved to write a poem, which read in part: “Peter, you are the floor, that others may walk over you…not knowing where they go. You guide their steps…You want to serve their feet that pass as rock serves the hooves of sheep. The rock is a gigantic temple floor, the cross a pasture” (John Paul II, Gift and Mystery 45). That’s the love of the heart of Jesus.

The priest knows the truth of this poem every time he is criticized harshly for standing up to the truth of the faith in the face of unpopularity and even derision. He knows this truth when he hears the offensive jokes, sees the crude memes, and reads the critical posts on Social Media. When we take them for granted, they gladly serve us, “as rock serves the hooves of sheep.”

Are they perfect? No – not a single one of them. Nor are any of us: not the Pope in Rome, the Bishop on his chair, the Priest at the altar, or the person in the pew. Not a single one of us has this Christian living thing all buttoned up. None the less, they lay down their lives day in and day out: they strive to make their very lives into the love of the heart of Jesus.

I am blessed beyond measure to have so many wonderful priests as friends: some of which have been friends for so long that I in fact would call them family. Some of those priests now rejoice in glory with the Lord. Some of those priests I was honored to have as peers in Seminary. Some of those priests I have come to know in more recent years. Some of those priests I talk to all the time, some of them only a few times a year, and some of them not at all anymore but the place they have held in my life is no less important. And yes, some of those priests aren’t in communion with Rome.

Since leaving the Old Catholic Church my relationship with the priesthood has become more complex than ever, and days like Holy Thursday drive that point home very poignantly. I have come to realize however that regardless of any of the details: I have my own, very meaningful and beautiful relationship with the priesthood. I have my own relationship with the living love of the heart of Jesus. So should every single one of us.

On this Holy Thursday: pray for your priests. Pray for vocations to the priesthood. Pray for those men who are in formation, those in discernment, and those who are being called but they just haven’t heard it yet! Pray for those priests who are struggling, because the evil one hates them, and he would love nothing more than to bring any one of them down!

To every single priest-friend of mine: I am forever grateful to every single one of you. I am grateful for the years of laughter, the ministry you have shown me – and the ministry you have in various ways shared with me. Thank you for sharing with me the love of the heart of Jesus. Know of my prayers for you this day, and always. May the good work begin in you, be brought to its fulfillment.

Ad multos anos!

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Original blog post for Holy Thursday: Emptied For You